Hello! I'm the Pilkington Icecream Man. This is my website! I thought about using it to advertise my Icecreams - but really there's not much point, as I only sell mini-milks. A few years ago, I found an overturned lorry full of them, and I've sold them ever since. Sometimes I have dreams that I'm making love to a mini-milk. Other times I have dreams that I'm making love to Ainsley Harriet.
But I am single (and have been for fifteen years), so I thought I'd use this site as a way to try and get a few dates. I'm not much of a catch, I'm afraid - I smell a bit, I'm only five-foot two, and I don't really have any common sense or knowledge - apart from the ingredients of a mini-milk! And the email address of Ainsley Harriet! I also know the Greensleeves tune both forwards and backwards, and in thirty different languages. Greensleeves is the best song in the world! I tried to paint my sleeves green once, but the paint came off onto some of the mini-milks and I accidentally poisoned a child.
Anyway, if that sort of thing appeals to you -why not get in touch? I have a Myspace page: www.myspace.com/smellyicecreamman
That's not a real Magnum! It's just an empty wrapper I found in a bin. I never eat anything but mini-milks.
That could account for my bad breath, actually.
I love mini-milks! I also love Ainsley Harriet. I wish he lived with me in my Icecream van. He could tell me hilarious stories about his time on 'Ready Steady Cook' and we'd be so happy. Toodlepip!